Feelings

Feelings - amazing and wonderful when we're positively affected. Difficult and dangerous when we're negatively affected. Feelings definitely get a bad rap at times and oodles of blame. They legitimately are what they are. They allow us a depth of experience in our lives that we could not have without them.

Ever notice how some people will blame feelings for their actions or lack of them? "I didn't feel like it", OR "I was so angry I did this". Also, you see some people blame others for their feelings. "You made me feel bad". Ultimately, people are responsible for their own feelings. It is true others can evoke feelings by things they do or say, but we are the ones who feel our feelings and they can be based upon disappointments, desires, fulfillment, expectations, needs and other things. It's healthy for us to admit that we feel our feelings and to investigate what they stem from. Are we disappointed about something we feel helpless to change - sometimes it is our own perceptions that limit us to stay in feelings that can cause us distress.

Interesting, feelings.

Renovations

Jesus took me into a room where it was large and warm and had a reddish glow. There was a large container that fitted into the edges (sort of like a casserole dish) of the room up high about chest high. I could not figure what it was at first. He put his hand on the edge of it and said it had to go. It was too small. He had just put it in recently and now it was time already for a new one. So, He had the construction crew lifting it out of the room. Beeping was going on as if a crane was lifting and the container was being removed. Jesus you show me walls – two walls - anger and stubbornness. They are fitted together at a corner – they are long walls. You showed me that you were expanding the area for the love container by knocking out those walls. I agreed that they had to go. I watch as you knock them out and fit me with an even larger container for love. I am so thankful. I love you Jesus and praise you that you always work on me. I asked to see you more and understand you more. You never fail me. You never stop the work. Yep – you said – it’s an ongoing project. It’s going to be a doozie. You’re already a doozie – but you will be even more beautiful. These renovations – they are always taking place – today I just get to see them in person. Jesus said it’s no coincidence that He’s a carpenter. He’s always tearing out and building. I asked why love needed a container – He told me it’s fluid and that if it didn’t have a container it would flood the whole neighborhood. I asked if that would be a bad thing – He said, all in due time.

More on Design

Seems like so many have expectations that have to do with health, security, money, prestige and they look to these things as some how making them feel happy.  Sadly, the evidence is that we have a world full of people with health, money, prestige and seeming security who are in no way happy.  They say insanity is doing the same thing time and time again with the expectation of different results.  Seems to me that there is rampant insanity in our world.   We get one freedom we can exercise with abandon every moment - the choice of how we respond.  We can choose how we will respond to each and every circumstance and situation regardless of our feelings.   Problem is, our responses are crafted by our beliefs and many of our beliefs have no basis in truth (stinkin thinkin leads to poor response).

When I see people who are grumpy, lonely and lost, I look at them with eyes of love and see their very great value.  I see every person as a person of great value, even those who have not led honorable lives. That's not to say that I appreciate all of the things that people do!  But, I see that their value is not in all the things they ever accomplished, failed at or the money they earned or didn't or what they did with people.  None of these things ever will or did add to or take away from their inherent value.  They have value because of who made them.   Not everyone lives in relationship with the one who made them and that is truly a shame because while their inherent value will never change - the reality of all that they were intended to be cannot exist apart from that relationship.  When people do not know who they are or what they were made for they can spend their whole lives thinking it's about themselves and their feelings and their control and accomplishment.  Gee, I did that for many years and sometimes I still do!  But, it's really the basics of design.  Whenever we try to operate outside of our design we are not fulfilled and is it any wonder we become broken?

Faith, Hope, Charity - these words are active and alive only in the one we're made for - and He thankfully transcends age.  :)

Design

Thinking about an illustration I pondered awhile ago and was revisiting this week.  So, we all are designed by and for God.  We think we're in charge of ourselves and we like to go our way and do what we like to do, all the while ignoring what we're made for.  It's like an electric can opener deciding it's really a framing hammer.  Yeah, an electric can opener may be able to pound nails into 2 by 4's like a framing hammer, but is that what it's designed for? No.  And, at some point is it likely that abusing it this way may make it nearly inoperable as an electric can opener?  Yes, at least it most likely wouldn't function as a can opener unless it was sent back to the manufacturer for repairs. 

So, I was thinking about how we completely miss our design at times and use ourselves in ways never intended for us and sometimes very harmful to us.  We need to read the directions - hear what the manufacturer intended for us and operate in line with our design.  Form and function - true of the human spirit, soul and body.

Just Need Some Nature

I work in an office day in and day out.  A computer and phone are constant companions hour by hour.  I actually leave my office every day for lunch so that I can get out and away from the environment for a period of time.  I usually make some time to be out in my yard or get away to the outdoors for some time when I'm not at work.  But, every once in awhile I need to be immersed in nature for a good period of time.  It's like a recharging of my batteries.  I have to do it - I need it - I'm made for it. 

This weekend I'm looking forward to connecting with the ocean.  Ahhh - can't wait!

Notary People

Went to take my Notary renewal today and was amused and amazed at all the different people and their attitudes. Odd people, Notaries.  Of course, I can say that since I've been one for over 20 years. Some were furious that they had to spend a day doing this.  Others were bored.  Some were worried (this was their 1st time).  Some were worried (this was their re-test)!  Some were worried they weren't going to pick up their children on time from day care.  Still others were relaxed and enjoying the time.  Some were dressed in office attire.  Others were in jeans and t-shirts.  There were young, old, women, men, cowboys, techno geeks, business folks, some in poor health, others fit as a fiddle - all sorts of people.  The proctors who administered the test were interesting - they seemed to have the knack of causing lots of the people to lose their patience and temper. Me - I was looking at Jesus a lot of the day.  He was just smiling there, pointing to one or another person for me to pray about.  I enjoyed the day with Him and all the people.  Think I passed the test - haven't failed it yet in all these years, but you never know!  If I fail, I'll just re-take the test and have another day enjoying the people with Jesus - again.  :D

Forgotten Dreams

Hard rains scour the mind
collecting into rivers,
rests forgotten dreams