I'm Expecting

I’m Expecting! Yeah, I’m over 50 now and have had 4 children, so, most people would not think it – but, I’m expecting! I want to shout it from the roof tops I’m so excited about it! Before, I never really thought something this wonderful would happen to me. No, no – Bob and I are not having another child.  But, yes, I am expecting!! 

How can it be?  Yes, Mary asked that same question and she was a virgin, never with a man.  The angel told her how the Holy Spirit would come over her and she would bear the child Jesus, who would save the whole world.   It’s the same with me!  Though I'll not have a baby - the real Jesus is being formed and born in me.  It's an expectant life - not knowing exactly what will play out, but knowing the greatness of the One who made it all and is active in every moment. Mary, you’re such a great encouragement in modeling how to walk through this. When I gave my life to Jesus and accepted the blood of his life given for me and received the newness of His resurrection – the Holy Spirit also came over me and now I too am expecting - bearing Jesus.  May it be to me as you have said, Lord.  Could you tell, am I showing yet? New moms, we're always wanting to show. Haha!

Each new moment with Jesus growing in me is a wonder.  Though there are days where there is no room in the crowds of the people of the world for Jesus to be birthed - birthed he IS!  Where many hearts are not open to his coming, there still are angels and host in the heavenlies announcing Him with great joy, shepherds in fields who see the signs and wise men – there are still those who come, who rejoice and gladly and humbly bear him the gift of their hearts.  Oh and I have the aches and pains that new birth brings, I’m certainly walking and moving differently these days.  My gait is changed drastically – you cannot be expecting without THAT! But, the evidence of the new Jesus life in me only makes me more and more overjoyed. I'm so grateful. The little kicks and movements of Jesus in me – they delight me so and fill me with awe! My soul magnifies you, Jesus. What an amazing life, he is so very real in me.  I never expected so much goodness and I marvel. Yep, there’s no denying it now, I’m heavy with expecting!  And, I loved putting on the new clothes attendant with expecting Jesus – love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness and self-control – these are not only beautiful and stylish (better than anything I’ve ever worn before and they are so me now!), but they are so functional (they allow me the freedom I need with growing Jesus in me).  And, remodeling has been taking place too - my life and my family's life - we have new areas fit and continuing fitting for the King of Kings!  Do I sound a little giddy?! Well, really I am and I don't care who knows it! :) It is brash and too much! Yes, it is. Because Jesus really is THAT GREAT! And the good news of not only His coming, but coming to live in us - well, IT IS JUST TOO MUCH!  I can take no credit for it - but I shall take great joy in thankful outrageous rejoicing about it! Isn't that what makes good news so good?!!  It is worthy of a real response that big and bigger! 

Ahh, and as I look around – so many others throughout history, now and into the future are expecting too. It’s quite a maternity ward, the earth!  Men and women, children and elderly, people of every tribe and tongue on the earth – Haha!  Quite a Kingdom, I'd say.  You can always tell when you meet an expectant one (wherever they are in their gestation), they are always glowing with Jesus – oh, He shines quite marvelously! The further on they are, the more He’s out front!  Ha!

Are you expecting too?  Oh, my dear friends and family - I wish for you the same as me, that you would also be expecting Jesus in you.  And, I don’t just wish it on Christmas (though that is a fabulous time to enjoy Him).  I pray it and wish it every day, for you - truly! Our heavenly Papa’s joy over you and all your loved ones this Christmas! And wonder – the deep kind that makes your mouth kind of drop open a bit – wonder of Jesus!  Love and hugs, oh yes, if you can get your arms around me - Haha!

Invisible

I glanced at him speaking with a woman as I walked into the grocery store.  A wave of pain hit me as I looked at my watch and hurried in. Goodie week necessitated crackers, cream cheese and salsa, so I’d left a little early to pick them up on the way to work.  As I brought my items to the one open register there he was, this young man talking with the checker about a phone.  The white hospital wrist band peeked out from under his hoodie sweatshirt sleeve as he stood talking.  The checker asked the man to wait as she called the store manager, and then turned to greet me.   As I was swiping my debit card I had a prompting to get cash for this man and hand it to him.  I never carry cash – but when I get promptings I purpose to act immediately upon them.  As I finished up my transaction the store manager came and was talking with this man.  I felt torn – I thought that I was supposed to give this to him, but he was walking away with the manager.   I picked up my bags and halted, looking to see again, then walked out.  I thought, “Well, Papa, I thought you said to give this to the man, but maybe I didn’t hear you right”.

Just then, as I’m stepping off the curb to open my car, the man walks out of the store and right in front of my parked car.  “Ha-ha!”.  So, I pull out the cash and walk over to him.  I let him know that I didn’t know if it would be helpful, but that I had been prompted to give him some cash.   Up close, he looked very fragile and alarmingly bruised and battered.  The purple mottling on his right temple and dried bloody cut over the bridge of his nose along with the haunting look of pain in his eyes completely assaulted me.   He thanked me and began to tell me that he’d had seizures and was just discharged from the hospital. He had no ride, no phone and needed to try to call someone.  He said everyone looked at him as though he were a monster or some sort of serial killer and all of them sent him off - no help.  I only saw a lost pain filled person in front of me. I asked him his name.  “Tyler”, he said. “Tyler, would it be alright if I prayed for you?”  “Yes, actually, I really need that”, he said.  So, he sat on the bench in front of the store and I prayed for him for some time all the things Jesus poured out over Him.  At that point I looked at Tyler.  I was not yet, but soon would be late for work.  But, I felt God prompting me to care for this man – regardless of late.  I asked the Lord what else I was to do for him.  “Tyler,  I don't have a phone, but, do you have a place you are staying?” I asked.  “No, my girlfriend is out of town.  And, I can’t stay with my dad.  He gets really angry and violent”.  I mentioned the Salvation Army, right up the street. He noted that his friend’s mom lived right down the street and if I gave him a ride there he could find someone to stay with.  I sensed no danger, but I check in with Papa, “Is this how we go?”  <Green light.>  So, into the car I load my bags and unlock the passenger side for him.  He thanked me.  As we drove down the street, he admitted that he was actually having seizures because he was coming off of drugs. He admitted he’d had alcohol today, but was off drugs.  I told him I’m part of a 12 step program at my church for addictions – Celebrate Recovery, so, I’m familiar with that.  He notes he needs to be in a program.  I gave him the info for our program and encouraged him to go.  As we pull up to his friend’s house, he tells me he really appreciates that I treated and saw him like a human being and not a monster.  I pray for him again and tell him to get into a 12 step, it will really help him.  He thanks me and says, “God bless you”.  “Tyler”, I say, as he’s ready to open the door, “Jesus says He loves you and He wants you to know He is with you. He wants you to turn to Him and trust Him. Go to a place where they know Him.”  As I drove away, I completely lost it.  I’m crying my eyes out for this man no older than my youngest daughter – 23 or so.  I cried out, in my car, breaking off assignments and partnership with lies and addiction over this man.  I asked God’s close walk with him and provision for him to have the help he needs. 

It is sort of interesting what comes to me as I think about Tyler.  Mary and Joseph in Bethlehem - in their need (a mother in labor) with crowds for the census - it became acceptable for people to ignore their need.  They became invisible.  I always had the impression when I was young that people offered the manger to Mary and Joseph.  Don't they always make it seem that way in the nativity plays? But, it wasn’t that way at all.  Luke 2:4-7 says “So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David.  He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child.  While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no guest room available for them.”  Mary and Joseph were in the city when Mary went into labor and gave birth – no rooms, no cover, no family.  And they just had to deal with it. Jesus’ first bed was a feed container.  It wasn’t quite the same, but similar – in Tyler’s need, people didn’t see him as a real person.  People looked at him and were so overwhelmed that they did not dare to engage his need.  It became acceptable for him to become invisible to them as a person, justified.

Wow, it’s so humbling.  I am on my face deeply grateful. God, in Himself - The Father, Jesus and The Holy Spirit– He saw our impossible need and we were not invisible to Him.  He is never overwhelmed by our needs.  He saw us as real people and He didn’t back away or vacantly tell us to move on.  He cares deeply.  He loves us.  And, He stepped up, himself, into our pain, sin, brokenness and death and took care of every need.  He did it before the foundations of the earth, at Calvary and…He still does.

Paradoxical Acts

Had some marvelous good stuff come to me recently and just wanted to share. I was in a discussion recently, where the question was whether or not Paul had a standard model for The Great Commission [establishing churches] and I had a thought strongly come to me in the midst of that discussion. In Acts, Philip went to Caesarea and preached the gospel and Gentiles came to faith and had the Holy Spirit come upon them in the same way the followers at Pentecost did. It seemed to me that God was out ahead of his church guiding them in that Peter [and eventually all the Jewish Apostles] had to come to see for himself that God was indeed intent on including the Gentiles. At the point where I raised this initial part of my observation the leadership of the group I was sharing it in voiced to me that I was off topic - that the Philip story was anecdotal.  I did not go any further during this group discussion.  However, I did send my questions and further commentary regarding the full point I was going to make to the group leadership for clarification.  The point I had been coming to is that despite any standard elements that we may draw from Paul's methods of establishing churches - we must keep in mind that God is more than able and willing to steer His people in directions that may fall far afield of their comfort, patterns, established ways and "standard models". That while it is helpful to look at what Paul did in establishing churches and that indeed elements may still be effective and worthy of incorporating today,that God, first and foremost, is still the one who has plans that we do not always see (Peter and the other Jewish believers clearly did not see it coming). And that He, at times, will take us far outside of our plans, in fact in directions that may make our jaw drop (in the case of Gentiles – diametrically opposite in some ways to Jewish tradition and laws)! This did not seem anecdotal to me as a theme drawn from Philip's excursion and results. There is tension throughout God's word and paradoxical themes as well. We get to learn to trust God in the tension. To see He is big throughout what we cannot seem to reconcile at times. The model I took away is that God is able to guide His people and to effectively fulfill His plans. It was re-enforced in that I observe in scripture that in Jesus’ day the Jewish leadership is a perfect example of having great confidence that they knew the law and therefore represented and operated rightly on behalf of God. It actually gave them a false confidence in their ability to observe rules over relationship with and trust in God. We see Jesus harshly condemning this. Peter and the other Apostles and Jewish believers would have followed that Jewish model if not for their sensitivity to and strict adherence to acting in accord with the Holy Spirit's confirmation of the situation at Caesarea (even though you can see that they clearly struggled with walking that out over time). I believe it takes being willing to put our gifts, callings and understandings into God's hands at every turn and in all things seek His counsel to see with His eyes and in submission to His heart in all of our plans to rightly fulfill His plans. The same thing is true of the selection of church leadership. The Jewish Apostles walked with Jesus. They took this to mean their appointment was by man’s selection – Jesus selected them and they selected a replacement for Judas from those who had been among them with Jesus. And that would be a great reliable model, except the irony is that the one Apostle chosen to go out reaching to the Gentiles and expand the church (Paul) did not walk with Jesus while He lived and was not selected by the Apostles, but had a supernatural encounter with Christ and that changed everything. Those apostles who walked with Christ when He was alive on earth had to eventually also come around and they went God’s way in recognizing that Paul was chosen by God for this work.

Acts is peppered with such paradoxical representations of how things work. Hold the model loosely and be willing to trust and cling tightly to God. Do you know the plans of God? The Jews thought they did – they thought sacrificing animals, eating kosher and many other rules given by God would always be the standard way of being God’s people. For a time, they were! Then God brings Jesus, fulfills the blood requirement and messiah in a way completely outside of what they expected and then He brings in the Gentiles (WHO KNEW?!). We can easily fall into the same trap of thinking that our systems and models (drawn from outlines in God’s word) effectively fulfill God’s plans. Part of the reason I believe people get so mesmerized by models is that we feel so safe in them, so much in control. It’s not so much that models are bad – it’s when we put more of our trust in them than we do God. Seeing rightly and having proper discernment of God's word and how to walk takes relationship with God (it’s what we’re made for). These things seem particularly important because they fly in the face of self-sufficiency (which can easily creep in with models and formulas). People get really scared about relying on God. It absolutely crucifies the flesh and "self reliance/self-centeredness" to do it. It’s painful and worrisome, UNTIL, we see that God honors it and supports it and requires it and works His plans amazingly through it. It's a journey we grow in doing as we continue on in our faith into the image of Christ - no person is able to do it perfectly. Dependency on God requires true deep humility. Do we trust God’s word – of course we do! And we can only walk in properly interpreting God’s word through His Spirit. God loves humble submitted hearts and those willing to consult Him, ask for His vision and immediately follow His leading are never put to shame.

The group leadership that I came back to with my further observations noted that they saw what I was  getting at. God brings people into awareness. And, those who are still not convinced in their own minds – the great thing is that God is the one who unfolds things in line with where He is going. Everywhere in the Church - I believe the most important thing a person can do is to intentionally seek God and deepen and develop their intimate relationship with Him - #1 thing. Doing this through exposure to His word and relationally through His spirit. God’s partnering in a way right now that is breathtaking!! So excited!! Embrace the paradoxical nature of God and rest in sureness that He is able to fulfill His plans.

Stir It Up!

I am sitting in another moment of the “outrageous miraculous”!  If someone had told me, I would never have believed them. God, you love to do this to me!!  God kept telling me, and while I kept walking in the way He instructed, I certainly did not see it working out this way - AGAIN!!  Can you imagine, being put in a situation where you look around and just do not see it working out in the natural - but, you keep going because you see something on the horizon that just looks incredible?  God keeps showing something so unbelievable, so breathtaking that I am on tip toe to see it completely unveiled!  I am committed to keep ON!  And, it had begun some time ago in certain areas to be unveiled, but each part is more amazing to me that the last!!  And, the fullness is yet to come!

This week, a group I walk with has opened the door for women to have the potential to walk in the way God has been prompting for at a whole new level alongside men in leadership.   I appreciate how much of a huge stretch of faith this was for them and still is, but I am so proud of them and so thankful to God for His amazing goodness and again – HE GETS THE GLORY!!   He kept saying to me – “It’s coming, just watch!!”.  But, it arriving is still so unbelievable, that I am laughing with hysterical joy at His goodness!! 

God, you are so deeply good and committed to who you have made us to be.  Thank you that you lead and guide every part of that process and are more than able!  I didn’t know how it was going to happen – but, yet, I knew He was going to do it!  And, He did and is!  Thank you Jesus – you are the most chivalrous, kind and caring and you take such good care of every detail!

Last night I was with some friends and we decided to go on a “Jesus Walk”.  It was an amazing time with Jesus (He really is the best!!).  Just before it was time to go, I asked Jesus if he had anything for me – He handed me a little silver sugar shell.  I looked at it and didn’t really know what to make of it.  He explained to me that it was for His goodness.   He said many people have things in their cups - things that are bitter, lacking, less than and they believe their cups will always lack.  He said, “You, stir in my goodness.  It’s sweet, sustaining, full of hope and abundance and revives and refreshes”.  The goodness of God – it’s potent and the supply, well, it’s unending.  I can never run out!  Good thing I got me a spoon!! HAHA!  Gonna stir it in and stir it UP!!  :D

Defamation of God

The issues regarding women - wow, there is so much there.  I have written about men and women honoring, submitting to each other and uniting with each other in authentic synergy as the way God's image will be rightly represented on the earth and bring a fullness that God will use in amazing ways.  Well, in line with that I actually had a book given to me recently that - no kidding here - almost verbatim had written in it some of the things God's been showing me over the years and some that I've discussed with a few of my mentors just in passing.  This book (The Forgotten Feminine by Denise Jordan) got to the heart of what is going on.  All of the attacks and misrepresentations about women historically and worldwide come back to one thing - the enemy wants to destroy the image of God. Really sit on that for just a moment. This is also true of the attacks on men as well, but the feminine historically and culturally worldwide has been more thoroughly assaulted as a whole. God is fully both masculine and feminine as well as completely other. We also, though we are males and females - have a mixture of both masculine and feminine uniquely in us (though our predominant way of living each will typically be shaded by the maleness or femaleness of our bodies).  Each person has varying degrees of the mix (you clearly see this in the make-up of individuals - just like God, who has both). However, certain factions are so clearly against anything remotely feminine in a male or masculine in a female that contempt and condemnation have been instituted to control, shame and manipulate people into behaving in ways that conform to these faction's beliefs.  It has been so pervasive, so insidious, so normalized in our culture to put down and mistrust anything associated with the feminine and so bind the masculine to a rigid code of conduct that even many Christians do not recognize that this is an attack on God. Especially in the west, God’s feminine aspects are all but a side commentary in most bible studies.  God is clearly misrepresented as solely masculine in many churches and as more masculine in most churches.  God embraces the feminine – it is legitimately part of who God is. God never shames or treats feminine traits as less than, undesireable, untrustworthy or secondary to masculine traits.  Many misinterpretations of scripture have lent themselves to the impression that even God would mistrust the feminine - but it is clearly inconsistent that God would ever devalue what is part of who God is. And God is breaking out women and so as well men, in a way never before realized in the world.  It is a way that will bring unity with both and fullness of God's image to fruition. This is a huge paradigm shift in process and more is on the way.  

Even if you embrace women, how God will be using them will be very very different from what people have previously been used to and envisioned.  And, so much of this also has to do with a greater unveiling of who the person of The Holy Spirit really is as well.  The Holy Spirit has been mostly left out of church discussions and teaching. The Holy Spirit is the person of the Godhead who encompasses several of the feminine aspects of God, though He is not the only one - both the Father and Jesus also have feminine aspects about them. The Holy Spirit is the one who holds us in the midst of The Father and Son's presence and helps us to receive all that God has for us. God is bringing a whole new level of understanding of identity – of who God is and who we are and it's very exciting - ground breaking, I'd say! :D

What has come to me personally about this revelation is so freeing - for me.   I cannot tell you how much I tried to talk God out of tapping me to ever talk about this whole subject. Funny how that never works! :) These issues are very near to my heart (Hey, God put them there), but, I never wanted to be viewed as someone who must automatically hate men if I stood up for women.  That is how those who stand up for the feminine are characterized and viewed by much of the world. I really am a champion of both being everything God made them to be because I understand how vital valuing and truly understanding both really is.  But in learning this very important aspect of the whole issue - that it's actually God's character, image and representation under attack - I can't tell you how relieved I am. It's as though a huge burden has been lifted off of me.  I don’t have to feel as though I’m trying to defend me or solely women and that is a great relief. I can speak on this with glorious FREEDOM now - thank you God - Wow, that's good!  And, it’s just a tiny part of a much bigger picture that God is bringing into view.  Amazing good things on the horizon!

Invitation To Dance With Love

So, last week, when I read a blog like so many I’ve read before, that shamed, blamed and while truthful on some details fell very short of loving, I deeply longed for someone to just stand up and re-frame the entire conversation. I kept thinking, “Where are the champions who can see the real issue here and look at this in the real light?”  I wanted someone to call up the best, not the worst.  At that point, Papa said, “What about you, December?!”  And...here we are!

Right now, God’s heart is deeply vesting in rising up His children in honor, unity and love with Him and people.  It is the literal hallmark of His Kingdom on the earth. It is the glorification of Jesus, in fact.  While that is His agenda – many of His people are busy pointing fingers at each other (and the entire world) in anger.  All the while the enemy is laughing with glee. When you really look at it – the enemy is the ONLY one who wins in this when people indulge in tearing each other down.  It’s just a continual repetition of the consequences of the fall.   He has strategically focused the attention of people on other people as the problem and objects of blame, shame, contempt, disgust, constant turmoil and unrest.  He has deceived even those who love the Lord into looking at others (even within the body) as objects of shame, contempt and rage.

Don’t get me wrong – bad behavior is not acceptable on any side of this (I no way endorse it).  Even Christ overturned the tables of the money changers and confronted the Pharisees.  But, he also died for them and from the cross asked God to forgive them because they did not know what they were doing. Maintaining a relentless focus on only the symptoms of a well-known problem has continuously proven it is not the way to solve it.  Christ died to reverse all that the fall brought about and God’s Kingdom is unfolding in ever greater measure to bring light and life where darkness and death have reigned. 

The blog post I read recently (Your Husband Doesn’t Have to Earn Your Respect – by Matt Walsh) focused on women’s failure to respect men and in fact culture’s failure to as well.  I do not argue with this – it is true, men have been disrespected and portrayed in ways untrue and wrong.  Matt talks about the crisis level this has come to and reasons why men act out with poor choices due to disrespect.  He describes in great detail the problem and what should be instead.  What he does not do is talk about the underlying cause and how God’s word tells us to address it.  Saying over and over what “should be” is not the same as godly wisdom and instruction.  In fact, who has ever changed the mind of someone on the opposite side of their argument through putting them down?  Please, if you’re out there – raise your hand high because I want to talk to YOU!!  And truly, I’m not just talking about Matt here – I’ve seen plenty of women do the same in posts as well - tearing men up. Heck, people in general love to tear each other up over everything! It is repetitive, tired and just causes people to hide, defend, and find more ways to protect. Display of contempt re-entrenches each side in their own position more deeply. After all, most attack is about fear, control, manipulation and protection in the first place!  Humans feel entitled to defend their own bad behavior in light of someone else’s bad behavior.  Beloved, we are each accountable and answerable for our own actions and choices (and we’ve all made very bad choices – each of us has).  While much of this attitude may stem from the disappointment people have in others, unfortunately, focusing on other’s faults blinds us to the opportunity and responsibility we have within ourselves (If you want to make the world a better place take a look at yourself and then make a – change ~ Michael Jackson). 

All of us are on a journey and need compassion and help on that journey.  We also need to recognize that we NEED others.  Others (even oppositional ones) are part of US.  They are not just disposable, inconsequential, objects of oppositional contempt.  We need to recognize the truth and extend compassion and forgiveness to others as we do to ourselves (don’t we somehow get over it in time and let ourselves off the hook? Even when we’re disappointed at times - we justify and move on).  We need to recognize that, hard as we try, we can’t make ourselves to be our best selves – why are we so much more violently intractable with others when they can’t either? We do not have to embrace wrong behavior to embrace another person (even ourselves).  So many get twisted and stuck in their own pain and wounding that they truly believe that only distance, control and manipulation through blame, shame and contempt will keep them safe, protect them and somehow set right those terribly wrong individuals.  Truly, seeing, supporting and calling up the best in others and encouraging them to unite and commit to grow for themselves in Christ into their very best self is the amazing opportunity that we have here, instead.  And, most importantly, personally committing in Christ to intentionally do the same ourselves!

I had scriptures come to mind when I thought about how God thinks about all of this.

Romans 12:21 “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”

Matthew 10:16 “I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.”

Ephesians 6:12  “For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places."

Matthew 5:38-48 “Here’s another old saying that deserves a second look: ‘Eye for eye, tooth for tooth.’ Is that going to get us anywhere? Here’s what I propose: ‘Don’t hit back at all.’ If someone strikes you, stand there and take it. If someone drags you into court and sues for the shirt off your back, gift wrap your best coat and make a present of it. And if someone takes unfair advantage of you, use the occasion to practice the servant life. No more tit-for-tat stuff. Live generously. You’re familiar with the old written law, ‘Love your friend,’ and its unwritten companion, ‘Hate your enemy.’ I’m challenging that. I’m telling you to love your enemies. Let them bring out the best in you, not the worst. When someone gives you a hard time, respond with the energies of prayer, for then you are working out of your true selves, your God-created selves. This is what God does. He gives his best—the sun to warm and the rain to nourish—to everyone, regardless: the good and bad, the nice and nasty. If all you do is love the lovable, do you expect a bonus? Anybody can do that. If you simply say hello to those who greet you, do you expect a medal? Any run-of-the-mill sinner does that. “In a word, what I’m saying is, Grow up. You’re kingdom subjects. Now live like it. Live out your God-created identity. Live generously and graciously toward others, the way God lives toward you.”

Galatians 6:1  “Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself.”

1 John 4:18  “There is no fear in love [dread does not exist], but full-grown (complete, perfect) love turns fear out of doors and expels every trace of terror! For fear brings with it the thought of punishment, and [so] he who is afraid has not reached the full maturity of love [is not yet grown into love’s complete perfection].”

Beloved – let us be diligent, wise and indulge God’s heart of love and hope and not our wounding and misperception that somehow we can shame or coerce others into doing the right thing.  If people want to be right with full blown indignation and contempt – it can be done and is done daily, ad nauseam.  But, God has chosen and modeled a different way. His people will manifest that they belong to Him by shining His heart.  It is true that people will still make their choices – outcomes are not up to us.  But, fear never overcomes fear – only love can do that.  Our job is not to make others behave – it is to display and invite them into the glorious divine dance with Love.  And Love – Love amazingly does all the rest.

Utterance

I recently heard a teaching that sparked a continuation of a discussion I’ve been having with God.  A friend, Pastor Mark Dahle, gave a great talk recently, “If You Want To Do Something, You Have To Start”. You can check it out on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UmwReWHDYxE

Along with going through the gift of prophesy (encouraging, building up and consoling others) which I really believe is huge in the Body of Christ right now – he also touched on the gift of Tongues.  Though all of Mark’s talk was very helpful, the tongues portion of the talk really caught my attention and got me started talking again with God about aspects of this that seem to be on His heart now for what He’s doing in regards to unity in the Body.

For many years I wanted the gift of speaking in tongues, but I didn’t like the “weird” aspect of it. I was too self-conscious about it feeling I could not do it right and was just too foolish in trying.  In an effort to make myself more comfortable with it I attended groups regularly that were helpful in inviting others to learn speaking and interpreting tongues.  They were friends and were not pushy about it at all, however, I still could not bring myself to engage it, even among friends I trusted.  I kept holding the longing to be free to speak in tongues in my heart and one day - finally, while I was alone - I asked God for the gift and told him that I was dedicating my mouth to His use and that I would move forward in doing it believing that He would guide and direct me in the use of this for Him, no matter how I felt about it.  That’s when I finally did begin speaking in tongues - in private in a room where no one else was and no one could overhear.  I actually spoke initially in a language that sounded (to my ears) like a human language.  I don’t know what language it was – sounded sort of Native American or an Asian form of some kind.  I did this for about 30 minutes and it became ok for me privately.  However,  I did not use it again privately or publicly until a few months later when I was in a group of believers in Jesus who began spontaneously singing in the spirit together in worship.  It was very natural and normal when that happened and I actually felt very free to engage in that moment of corporate worship.  There were no people there checking to see if others were interpreting or worrying about anything but responding to God.  It was a group of like-minded followers who were just enthralled spontaneously by God’s presence and responded with singing in other languages and with their own music as well.  Each brought their own words, melodies and harmonies.  I had never heard something like it before, though I have been in places where it has happened since.  It so connects in a way appropriate to the awe inspiring glory of God.  He is creative and honors creativity.

I speak in tongues from time to time.  It’s not a badge of honor and it doesn’t make me a better Christian or person. It’s not a set routine thing, but happens usually spontaneously -  mostly something done in private.  I have heard many variations of the types of languages – some sound human, some not like any human language I know of.  I like singing in tongues in my car when I worship.  Sometimes when I’m in worship in a group I’m prompted to speak in tongues during the time others are singing.  People can’t hear me, so I go for as long as I am prompted.   Sometimes I speak in tongues under my breath silently while praying for someone.  I have also interpreted tongues, where prompted, in settings where someone is speaking in a group.  I have only once had the interpretation of my own words given to me.  I am sensitive to those who are fearful of tongues.

I find something interesting in the bible about languages and where different ones began and why they began.  From Genesis 11 it says, “Now the whole world had one language and a common speech.  As people moved eastward, they found a plain in Shinar and settled there…Then they said, ‘Come, let us build ourselves a city, with a tower that reaches to the heavens, so that we may make a name for ourselves’…The Lord said, ‘If as one people speaking the same language they have begun to do this, then nothing they plan to do will be impossible for them.  Come, let us go down and confuse their language so they will not understand each other.’  So the Lord scattered them from there over all the earth, and they stopped building the city.”

So, people had their plans - to build a city with a tower that reached to the heavens in order to make a name for themselves.  And God had His plans, from Genesis 1, “So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them;  male and female he created them. God blessed them and said to them, ‘Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground.”  It looks as though men came into conflict with God in their goals.  The unity that people had at the point where they began to go their way is something that God dismantled.  He confused their language so that they could not understand one another and work together, but were scattered in accord with His original plan for them.

In the times we now live in, as I mentioned before, God is doing something very special regarding unity. Since people have already been scattered all over the earth, it is time to come into unity of purpose in God over the earth.  It is a huge theme on God’s heart and something that has been drawing various very diverse parts of the Body of Christ together in amazing ways.  He is also using languages to reach different people.  Something not spoken of very frequently, but was used by God to reach hundreds of people on the day of Pentecost was the use of tongues to reach each person hearing in their own language about the mysteries of God that were being spoken by those under the influence of the Holy Spirit in Acts. This is another use of the gift of tongues - to reach others in their specific language through the Holy Spirit’s guidance and pouring out.  This is reversing the confusing of languages to unity in God with His agenda.  God’s people have to get over their fears of tongues in order to walk in this. God legitimately uses this to reach people with His truth.  Heavenly personal language for building up our spirit is good and important, but, there is this additional practical use of tongues that God has in store for unifying nations in His truth.  We have to see this and press in to God’s leading on it.  Just sayin!

Again, no better time to live than now in my mind!! Love pondering this – there is more, so much more. Thank you God – bring us into the fullness of understanding this gift and your use for it in glorifying you in the way you always intended!

Waterfall Dancing

So, it started from snug in back of the sleek black chariot, smoothly speeding its way to LAX.  I asked God what this man needed (my driver). I was quiet - listened for a long long time and He put it in my heart to pray for a touch from God that would really change him – letting him know how much God loves him and wants relationship with him.  Then I asked, “Jesus, do you want me to say anything to him?”  As I sat listening, waiting for God to share, I began to get a word about this person.  The word “Guardian” came.  It wasn’t something I was looking for, but it just popped into my mind.  Then, “He protects things and people”.   So, didn’t know John from anyone – couldn’t get much of a physical impression, just the back of his head was visible.  Didn’t know if he knew Jesus or didn’t.  Didn’t know what “Guardian” or "protecting things and people meant”, but, was just prompted to share with him.  So, thinking (logic here now) – hmmm…how do I share something with him like this without sort of looking weird or scaring him?  I’ve learned that this is typically the enemy’s salvo to keep me from stepping into what the Lord wants to do – so I ignored logic and stepped up with, “So, John – it’s been impressed on me that you are someone who is a guardian. You’re someone who protects things and people.”  John, a little surprised but somewhat interested said, “I would say yes.  I was in the same profession for over 20 years.  I’m retired now.  Don’t really need the money, but I drive people around for fun and just extra spending money.  He said, yes, I think I would say you have it right.”  He laughed when I shared my name and its origins – thought it was interesting.  His wife’s birthday is on the same day as mine too.  He shared how he has trouble remembering important dates (thinks all men have this issue) but says he lucked out that his wife’s birthday is on Pearl Harbor Day and she made it easy on him by planning their wedding for Valentine’s Day - said it really helps him remember.   I told him I’m very blessed, that I have a husband who remembers important dates very well.  I said, “I’m getting that dates are not maybe something you’re good with, but details are.  You are observant and take note of things and details (maybe not dates) but lots of other things.” Then, I asked him what he did.  He went into how he had been a police officer for 20 years, working most of it protecting areas and people in areas where avocado growers had issues with pot growers using their lands for marijuana.  He shared some interesting observations and things he’d learned about life through that process and said, yes, it was true – dates he was not good at, but details and observation – he was gifted in those areas.  He shared many things and I thought, “What a precious person, Lord”.   As I listened to John, I also was listening for Jesus to tell me what He wanted John to know just for him.   I heard, “Tell John that I love him very much and that he is a special son of my heart.  And tell him I just love to be around him and that it’s really not about anything he does or that he has to do anything – I just like him for him.”  So, I began with, “Jesus impressed on me how very much He loves you and that you are a special son of His heart”.  He said, “Well, thank you very much for that” and while he sounded a little as though he was being somewhat just courteous, indulging me, I then went on to tell him that he really didn’t  have to do anything but that Jesus just likes him for himself to hang out with him.  He shifted a little then to sincerely being glad.  The last thing of John I remember was his big smile and warm sincere handshake as he made sure my bags were secure on the walkway and a kind goodbye and good wishes for my trip and hope I may see him on my return!

Oh, God is sneaky – yes, He really is!  And it’s so good that He is because surely He uses that to get around my entrenched wrong beliefs as well as ignorance regarding changes He wants to make in me.  Thank you God that you are faithful to complete the work you began!  So, São Paulo, Brazil – beautiful and horrible.   Deeply gifted and destined by God to be His glory in the world and terribly bound by things doing all in their power to warp and twist and derail her from her destiny.  I see similarities in me.   And just as God is sneaky in how he completes my transformation, so He is also in São Paulo.   The lovely area of town (Jardim Paulista) that my hotel was located in had some beautiful and very expensive shops, fine restaurants (São Paulo is known for its gastronomic delights), art galleries, and some mighty big banks (whole blocks worth).  It was a hub of activity day and night.  And just a few blocks away, interspersed hovels.  Painfully cramped and unfriendly spaces smothered in poverty and streaked in smoggy dirt.  Those buildings not protected by iron fencing were covered with graffiti (though there were pockets where graffiti artists had done some of the most beautiful works throughout the city).  Though for my company this trip was a whirlwind in and out visit to customers at the Hospitalar expo – God also had this time planned to sit with him about, over and for São Paulo.  Though there was much corruption and poverty in the city and outlaying suburbs God also had placed His strategic warriors there who He constantly partnered with.  They were opening light and truth in dark dark places.  I prayed in partnership with them (though I never spoke to or saw a live one of them in person –that I recognized anyway) we were joined by God’s spirit together for this area.  I don’t know why, but even last year in São Paulo, I had such a deep connection with God’s presence in a way I have nowhere else.  Truly, I just spend most of my time in tears there and on my face.  It is a deeply embittered land.  Pride in the culture and horrific wrongs upon the indigenous peoples as well as government corruption over all of the people – the bitterness is almost palpable in some areas.   And yet, there is such a heart there – something so fantastic.  There is a deep purity and holiness placed in the DNA of São Paulo.  There is a reverence for God’s Holy Spirit there.  Riding on the subway, I could see the oppression on the people.  As I rode, I prayed God’s refreshing – his rising love and light and sustenance - His bright truth and holiness - His purity and faithfulness!!  He makes a way where there seems to be no way. He is victorious in the face of overwhelming odds.  He never fails and He is fully committed and He is there!

I had to laugh – I came alone to São Paulo this year and was skeptical if I would remember how the subway route went and getting to the convention center and back.  I gave myself the option to take a cab if I was really off.  But, thankfully, The Holy Spirit is completely capable and in charge with getting me to and from places – He just always needs me to step up.  So, I did – I stepped up.  I found the right counter to purchase my subway tickets and hopped on the train.  I even made the transfer and ended up at the right destination (was there ever any doubt? – easy as cake!).  My only difficulty came when I arrived back at my stop to go to my hotel.  For whatever reason, I took the wrong escalator to the wrong exit up top, street side.  The first day it was initially disconcerting.  How I ended up over a block away from where I entered the subway that morning is still a mystery to me.   The irony is that I was only really about 2 blocks from my hotel – however, I had no idea which direction it was in – no landmarks stood out to me at all, which made it feel as though it was a million miles away.   Thankfully, again, The Holy Spirit is my ever present director.  Hey, it’s not an adventure until something goes terribly wrong!   So, there I am, looking up and down the street – not a thing in sight makes any impression of any kind upon me – but inside I suddenly hear – “cross the street”.  So, I cross the street.  Once there, I don’t really feel anymore sure about anything than before I’d crossed.  Then I get a prompt – “head left”.  So, I head left.  Then I see a little car dealership and sense a prompting to make a right there and I do.  I go down a block and waddayaknow I’m smack dab in front of the street my hotel is on! BUT, I don’t know which way I’m supposed to turn to get to my hotel (still nothing looks familiar).  So, the prompt is to go left and – low and behold, down a ways there is my hotel!!  Whew!  OK!  God, again, you prove exemplary in your ability to direct and lead – I get it; I really really can trust you!  So, the next day, after all of my visits and all of my scouting new potentials I have my notes and leads and I’m headed out of the convention center to go to the hotel and get my bags and head for the airport and I look at the sky – Ooooh, DARK, is an understatement.  Some heavy rain on the horizon.  The morning had started out similar to light Santa Ana conditions in Southern California – a light breeze and 80 degrees.  It was beautiful outside, so I decided I didn’t need my rain coat.  About now, I was remembering how having my umbrella last year was a life saver as we came out of the exhibition to the downpour.  This year I just prayed I’d make it back to my hotel before the rain broke.  Well, that prayer - it was answered just a little differently than I’d envisioned.  I made it to the subway with just a light bit of rain hitting me.  No problem, I thought.  It will clear before I come out to walk to the hotel.  Then, made it to the correct stop – Yay!  But determined NOT to make the same mistake I’d made the day before about going up at the wrong street exit – I purposely took the opposite exit to the one I took the day before.  And though this exit did not have a covering and the rain was buckets I kept going up, up, up into drenching rain!!  WOWEEE!!  OOOH – shocking, soaking – looking around for bearings – blinding rain – no coverings to stand under – just a tall rigidly stark and unhelpful row of government and bank buildings with no doorways to stand in.  It was quite laughable, really.  But initially I was not really laughing.  In my business suit and shoes with my portfolio and purse I stood with my hand over my eyes, shading them from the downpour – scanning the scene to see where I should head.  Same situation as the day before – no idea where I was or where I should go.  Not one landmark – heck everything was absolutely blurred with water.   Suddenly, I get the prompting – “cross the street”.  Now this day, with logic trying to interrupt, that seems a very wrong prompting to me.  I think, hey, I took the completely opposite escalator what if I’m on the opposite side of the street?!!  Now, standing there, in ridiculously blinding rain struggling with myself as to whether or not I’m going to take the prompting or hang on to my logic – that was pretty comic (REALLY DECEMBER?!). Haha!   SUDDENLY, I heard the invitation!   It was for a dance in the rain – yes, really!  With my hair utterly drenched, weighed down with water streaming out of it, my glasses completely covered in beads of rain (not much could be seen through them) and my suit absolutely sodden through and heavy pulling down on me,  rain pouring over me relentlessly - God was inviting me to dance in the rain with Him. In other settings, of course - dancing in the rain is one of my very favorite things to do.  But here, it sounded so ludicrous, so foolish and humiliating yet so invigorating, refreshing and completely wonderful to me that I said YES!!  And this was no ordinary rain, God orchestrated a dance in the waterfall with Him!  I was completely taken up!  My shoes were covered in water as the rain was so hard it could not run off, but just piled upon itself on the ground in a splashing pool.  I laughed and danced and my heart was light and joy filled.  I smiled at the people with their umbrellas passing me by – looking at me and my dancing in my bedraggled condition with pity.  I didn’t care.  Then, with the slick uneven walk ways ahead - I surprisingly surefooted my way back to my hotel - guided exactly as before (haha!).  By the time I arrived the rain had stopped – but my heart was still dancing – dripping, but dancing.  I felt a little sheepish as one of the housekeepers was in the doorway mopping up water as guests came in from the rain.  I left quite a puddle.  Then the kind staff gathered my bags for me (I had already checked out that morning) and I headed to the bathroom to change clothes and pack up my soaking duds to go to the airport.  As I dried off with paper towels and put on my dry travel clothes (stowing my wet ones in a large zip lock I always bring with me on trips) I felt invigorated.  God not only spoiled me with a special refreshing dance with Him – he gave me the shower I had no time for or ability to take prior to leaving.  I brushed my sopped hair and styled it back off my face – put on my rain jacket and headed for the door.  The doormen insisted I should take a cab, but I had taken the airport bus in and intended to take it out. I asked if they would just make sure it stopped for me.  They were kind enough to flag it down and I made it to the airport with time enough to catch some dinner, exchange my Reals and pray over some folks in the terminal before taking off.  As I sat on the plane that night - my hair was softer than I'd ever felt it and my skin too - I was relaxed and rested on my trip home.

I ponder the things Papa does.  Sometimes that’s the best part of my trip.  It’s like looking at a photo album together with Him and Him telling me things about it I didn’t even see when I was in the moment – kinda from a different angle.  God made a shift in me on this trip.  I was stuck and He knew just what would un-stick me.  I had convinced myself that I am just not cut out for certain things.  He showed me I was wrong, very wrong.  He showed me that no matter what I think about me – He is always committed to make me who He’s made me (myself!).  I don’t have to be cool, or especially put together or particularly graceful or know everything – that how I look to others or myself does not matter - doesn't make me legitimate or qualified.   That at what seems to me to be my most disoriented, directionless, bedraggled, embarrassing, dripping moments of silliness that I am dear, legitimate, deeply wanted, treasured, valued, walked with in measureless ways and greatly enjoyed by Him.  Believe me, a part of my heart needed to know that.  He told me, “Whatever side of the street you come up on, I am always with you, love you and I always lead and guide you!!  And, the invitation stands – I always want to dance with you!!”

Magoo

It's incredible how arrogant I can be about what I think I know.  I always hope it may be more my "Magoo-ism" than real arrogance, but the truth is, I operate from a place of deep deception when I am going by MY brain and what I've processed in it and rely on as what I know.  Really, the whole world is caught up in what we know and how very smart we think we are.

I made my little "pie chart" here with whole percentages for illustrative purposes (maybe I think I'm smart or sumthin :D) The smallest slivers of the pie should actually be fractions of what they are, but they don't really show up very well when put into that format, so, I'm conveying more the overall concept here (really, we're closer to the larger pie portion being  99.999%). The deal is this - we are completely at the mercy of what we don't know that we don't know. What we do not know - as a whole, it's literally staggering. If we even had an inkling, we'd likely try to hide under a rock or beg for one to fall on us. You may laugh, but, it's not actually funny.  I am convinced that GOD guards us in the midst of our ignorance. It's really just one more BIG reason to fall face down in love and gratitude to Him for who He is and for His great love and mercy to us.

And, because God is able to preserve us through all we don't know He is greater than knowledge.  He is over, above and far beyond all knowledge and knowing and the only reason that we can know Him is because He has first made Himself known to us. But, being ONE with Him - that is different.  It is a choice on our part - giving ourselves to Him - that is a response on our part, a further step than just knowing He exists.  That is trusting Him with our very self. The fear of God is the beginning of wisdom - this is fear as in AWE that brings a true understanding of how no one BUT GOD is trustworthy (least of all, me).   Job said of God, "Though He slay me, yet will I hope in Him". That is trust beyond pain and death and that's just a taste of how BIG and ABLE God is!

Whew!  I am so glad that God is THAT great and good. Makes me really excited that I actually BELONG TO HIM!!  God didn't just stop at guarding us through ignorance, though - oh, no no! He actually invites us to oneness with Him and in that to operate from HIS GREAT MIND!  The renewing of our minds is ever on HIS mind! But then, He's made ALL things new too!  All of us is renewed in Him. Our whole self!  So, in oneness with God we become overcomers! What a fantastic life that is!

I love how God's great pleasure is in taking Magoo's (when we say yes to Him) and making them over, above and far beyond all knowledge and anything else in Him!  Praise and thanks to Jesus - who sealed the deal for us!  More of you, Jesus - we just need a greater awareness of you!

Nakedness

I was talking with some friends recently and we were noting how God touched us in a similar way when we all saw “The Passion of The Christ”.  We were noting how that film gave us a new level of understanding - a deeper reality and awe of how much Jesus suffered and the horror of his death.  We all agreed that there was such a terrible feeling we had at the reality that Jesus had suffered so hideously for us and yet such a deep gratitude and gratefulness that He did that for us personally.  I noted that the only thing left out of all portrayals and films was the fact that Jesus was also naked on the cross and that this was in addition to all of the tortures and humiliation and shame he underwent.  Then one of my friends noted that she had been studying the scriptures about that very thing and that in looking at how Adam and Eve went from being naked and unashamed into covering themselves once they ate the fruit from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil and their eyes were opened that they were naked.  She said that when those who set out to shame Jesus on the cross by putting him there naked were actually fulfilling a divine plan that Jesus was the restoration of those things lost in the fall.  Nakedness without shame is one of the things lost at the fall.  Nakedness is restored through Jesus.

This actually really struck me considerably when I heard her say this. In that moment, Jesus sort of unfolded something before me.  It was considerably daunting and sobering to look at.  Just briefly, Jesus flashed before me that all things are uncovered in heaven for all to know.  There is nothing on this earth we will have done or thought that would or could ever be hidden.  Now, this thought put some deep consternation into me.  I immediately thought of the shame I would feel at being so fully and vulnerably revealed to all others in heaven and it’s because I know I am not completely holy and pure in so much of what I am.  There are things I would want no other person to know about me.  This was actually quite a good exercise for me to undergo, because it revealed my own heart to me. 

I have received so much freedom at Celebrate Recovery – a Christ Centered 12 Step program based on the Beatitudes.  It is a place where I can be authentic and really talk about things without the worry of shame from others. It is confidential and I can be real and take off masks of people pleasing and performance to be acceptable.  I am accepted and can speak about difficult things that I struggle with in a real way – with no judgment. I also have people I am accountable to which keeps me honest. It is amazing how this process cleanses me from fear and shame.  When I am honest and real about what is going on inside me – it always brings me relief and takes the power away from hidden shame.  We are only as sick as our secrets.

The one thing that struck me in what Jesus revealed is that I want to be honest about everything I have been hiding away.  I want to come clean with it long before I stand in heavenly company “naked”.  I want to stand naked – in the sense of real before all people NOW. That is a good discovery to make and one that I take very seriously and am pressing into.

So, I give my testimony again this July at CR.  I’m being prompted to take off my proverbial "fig leaves" and walk more “naked” than ever before.  Clothed with the righteousness of Christ alone – my piteous efforts at self-covering are not only in no way needed, but actually prevent me from living free.  I want freedom – I want it, I want it, I want it! I will have it in greater measure!  Thank you, Jesus.

The Man with the Crucifix and Dove Girl

My First trip to Brazil was last May.  Remembering the first day there with my manager in the subway station - a young man of about 25 approached me wearing a wooden crucifix.  Came straight up to me, though my manager was walking with me.  He began anxiously pouring out Brazilian Portuguese.  I brokenly grasped that he asked if I understood Portuguese - but I had to tell him that I did not. He had a smile and look of happy expectancy on his face.  He kept looking at me intently and talking a million miles a minute.  I had to remind him that I did not understand. He held up his crucifix and then I could tell things shifted as he began to pray, though he still looked at me intently.  My manager was looking at me sort of strangely, I nodded at the young man and smiled at him very big. He was not put off at all that I could not understand him - he fervently prayed. He ended his prayer in the sign of the cross over me.  I thanked him and blessed him and had to be on my way to catch our train.  What a wonderful welcome to Brazil that was!! And, what a great trip it turned out to be!

I had been praying about the "Jesus Appointments" that I knew God would send - He always gives me assignments when I travel (well, really I have them everywhere, but traveling is especially full of them).  And, He always unfolds things in a different way every time. As it turns out, our interpreter was a week long "Jesus Appointment" on this trip.This was our first year exhibiting at the trade show in Brazil.  We hired an interpreter to help, as most Brazilians do not speak English.  The woman who set up our interpreter made a last minute change from one girl to another as the girl she initially set up found a full time job that started immediately. The woman who took her place was a stunningly beautiful person.  She spoke several languages (English, Spanish, Brazilian Portuguese, Arabic and some Hebrew) and was actually also an actress (she was one of the Dove commercial girls) who did interpreting on the side to help support herself between acting jobs and to continue to practice the languages she knew.  Each day we went out to visit several of the many booths that filled the convention hall.  We then came back and spent a period of time at the booth answering questions from many of the visitors who came, while my manager went out for meetings.  During the times when traffic was slow - we would talk about many things.  During one of the lulls one day, she told me the story of when she was a little girl. She noted that she was about 5 or 6 years old and enjoyed playing with her little girlfriend and a neighborhood boy about the same age, who was so cute.  One day, she, her little girlfriend and this boy were walking together.  He knew that both of the girls liked him and this day the girls decided to find out which one of them he liked best.  So, they asked him.  Being a little boy, he told them that he would tell them right after he went and got himself an ice cream.  As he turned to run across the street for the ice cream, he was struck by a bus and killed instantly right in front of the girls. The girls were in shock, devastated - the situation was made more frightful as this girl's mother did not know if she was the one run over as the clothes she had on were a similar color to the boy's clothing and she saw her mother frantic and screaming in the crowd of people right after the accident.  This was just one very painful thing in this woman's life.  She had many other things that happened to her that would leave many people in a huddled mess for life.  But not her, she was out moving through life with determination, though there was still much anxiety in her.

God gave me a special few days time with her and it was very wonderful.  He showed her some things she did not see and mostly, Himself in a way she did not know Him. He's always the best that way.  I could tell people till the cows come home how much God loves them and how deeply committed He is to them, but, when Jesus says it - it's just different.  There is something so amazing in how He brings the truth.  He does it on His own - I only pray, He does the talking. The people have to tell me what He's done, because while I may suspect, what he actually says and does - it's just miraculous.  I love watching how He works.  He is the most loving, wonderful, kind, gentle, deeply committed and caring.  When people have received what He wants them to know - I can always tell, because their faces go from pain to immediate peace and joy - they just start to glow!

I'm headed to Brazil again this year.  I'm looking ahead and praying about the "Jesus Appointments" for this trip. God is so good.  He just loves to free people.  I love traveling with Him and seeing Him in action. I wouldn't trade the time with Him for anything.

The Enormity of Oneness - ARE YOU READY?

Ok – I’m overwhelmed.  Right now, God is unfolding something so astonishing that humans will pinch themselves to determine they are not dreaming when they see the enormity of it.  Seriously, I am ever reminded why I am thankful to live in this time!

God – His focus has been, is and always will be our oneness with Him. I’ve said it before and will again – God, wanting us to be one with Him – that single thought is the greatest thought I will ever have (TREASURE UNENDING!).  Everything, simply everything in our life has to do with this one thing.

God, in His outrageous goodness – always intended us for oneness with Him.  We are designed for Him and intimate union with Him.  He made every single provision for us so that we could live in accord with that if we chose it.  Before the foundations of the world – Christ was slain.  God knew that free will would bring about sin and death and dealt with it long before it was ever a reality.  He dealt with it as a side issue – not the main issue.  The main issue is always oneness with Him!  He crafted us to uniquely display Him in a way no other person ever could. Every single person ever born - past present or future – has been reconciled, crucified on the cross with Christ and buried in death with Him.  The question for each person - each life is, will they say yes to LIFE in Christ?  Will they choose to live in oneness with God?  It’s a choice – a free choice.  God invites us and wants each one completely for themselves.  He longs for each of His perfectly unique masterpieces to say yes – however, He will never force anyone against their will.

When we are baptized – what we are doing is publicly acknowledging that God made every provision for our personal and corporate oneness with Him and that we accept His great life as our own – we accept and say yes to oneness with Him (strikes me like accepting a wedding proposal).  We acknowledge that our old self  – the unworthy, bad, sinful us that could never change – died with Jesus as he shed His blood and died on the cross and was buried with Him (that's how going under the water represents our death with Christ).  And we excitedly embrace and acknowledge our resurrected status - ever rising up in the NEW ABUNDANT LIFE IN HIM and OUR NEW NATURE OF RIGHTEOUSNESS!!  And we commit to an ever more astonishing life, renewing our mind in the fullness of God (which makes us able to live more and more righteously); we unpack and unfold the treasure of what living His life and love on this earth looks like in Kingdom fullness!

In many parts of the Body I continue to hear things like – “We’re not worthy” aimed at the body of Christ.  Those words were only ever true of and applied to the old sin nature.  For New Creations in Christ, old things have passed away – we are co-heirs in Christ – we have been made worthy!  This "unworthy" language does not apply to us.  New Creations are focused on thinking, speaking and living in alignment with God.  We see ourselves only with His eyes, which only see us completely qualified in Jesus.   I am starting to hear and will hear more and more teaching on this – God is very intentional about it this year.  Those who are one in God are beloved children of God and we are the righteousness of Christ.  We cannot live or speak double mindedly on this.  Many struggle with appearances – they wish to appear humble and want to avoid any hint of what might be considered arrogance or pride in speaking on these matters.  The truth is – Christ’s life is wonderful and amazing and glorious.  Those in Him are going to be all those things, authentically – with Christ in them they can’t help it!  It is one amazing way all men will be drawn to Christ lifted up!!  Christ in you, the hope of glory!! He is lifted up when we live His life!  And, you can see it – you know people who are in God – we see their union – their oneness with God upon them.  This is what God desires - that we abundantly live His life in the way He's uniquely designed each of us to shine it.  While we can be amazed at it, we don't have to get all funny about it or mince words or worry because we know that GOD INTENDED ONENESS – it wasn’t our plan, it was HIS!  And we didn't somehow make it happen - we accepted all that was done and became NEW!  It’s not arrogant to be God’s glory.  It’s really natural because HE intended it and He made us for it!!!  

True humility comes from knowing God and His amazing greatness.  Nothing will humble a person faster than to truly know God’s pureness, holiness, justice, goodness, greatness and love. There is no better life than knowing God and acknowledging and holding Him up in amazed wonder, exaltation and grateful adoration! It’s not about voicing self-loathing to somehow prove the absence of pride. Arrogance and pride are CAUSED only by fear.  Shaming ourselves or other people is never God’s way to get rid of pride. Shame never ever works.  It just teaches people that they must put on more masks to hide and do more intricate dances in order to look righteous enough – it never makes them righteous inside.  God eradicates fear with perfect love.  Only perfect love casts out fear.  Only saying yes to perfect love makes us righteous. Pretty amazing concept – but God’s the author and demonstrator of that.  We get to grow marvelously in THAT!

Whew!!! GOD YOU GO!! You amaze me, God, and I am so thankful.  I am so overtaken. You fascinate me and I want to know you, love you and serve you more and more.  I will never tire of seeing you be your wonderful self and how the fullness of you spills into everything and everyone around you!  Thank you, for who you are!!

He Likes Me?

 From Miriam Webster:

¹like

 verb \ˈlīk\

: to enjoy (something) : to get pleasure from (something)

: to regard (something) in a favorable way

: to feel affection for (someone) : to enjoy being with (someone)

liked lik·ing

Full Definition of LIKE

transitive verb

1

chiefly dialect :  to be suitable or agreeable to <I like onions but they don't like me>

2

a :  to feel attraction toward or take pleasure in :  enjoy<likes baseball>

b :  to feel toward :  regard <how would you like a change>

3

:  to wish to have :  want <would like a drink>

4

:  to do well in <this plant likes dry soil> <my car does notlike cold weather>

intransitive verb

1

dialect :  approve

2

:  to feel inclined :  choose, prefer <leave any time you like>

It was interesting.  I had a conversation recently that caused me to look up the word “like”.  I really didn’t find anything unexpected or earth-shattering in the definitions above.  But, the reaction I had to the word during that conversation has caused me to sit and ponder it a bit.  Looking back on it, I’ve had really similar reactions to the word in several conversations (all different people but the same topic) over the last several years.  I was sharing with a friend how much God really “likes” them. The response was off the charts!  You would have thought I went and grew a third eye on my face right in front of this person by their look.  It was sort of comic, really.  It started out as flat out disbelief, incredulity, then a sort of “could it be possible?” morphing into a sort of “nah, you’re just pulling my leg”.  But all through, they kept looking at me as though I was somewhat crazy, as though the idea that God could actually like them was beyond belief! 

It’s even more interesting – believe it or not – that the same people who have acted rather shocked that God could really like them are ready enough to believe that He loves them. Maybe it’s the “For God so loved the world…” (John 3:16) verse that has them convinced that he generally loves, because, well…He loves the whole world! But, they think, "Not really ME just as and for myself".  Or maybe it’s the idea that He loves everyone – He’s God – He has to, it’s in His nature and character!  But it’s only that sort of, "I love you because I have to (I’m loyal)" and mostly that translates to “I put up with you” in their hearts.  After all, you may “love” your Uncle Mort.  He’s family and you love your family.  Doesn’t mean you want to spend countless hours with him or take him on vacation with you every year. But, you would help him, can put up with his corny jokes or crabby rants during the holidays or visiting.  You have a loyalty to him.  But liking – that’s a whole different category.  Liking someone involves actually preferring their company and looking forward to being with them for themselves! 

Some people may not believe it - But God actually does like people.  I found this out very personally over the last few years myself.  Though I’ve always had a sense that God loves me – I didn’t really believe He personally preferred me.  Oh, I knew that He committed everything in and through Jesus so that I could spend eternal life with Him (hey, I know John 3:16).  But in my heart, on an ordinary day of the week – what exactly did God loving me look like?  Yes, He brought the sun up, gave me my every breath, food, people, etc… Believe me – I’m grateful and very thankful for each and every thing. But still, aren’t those things He is, being God (The Creator)?  I didn’t have a very deep understanding of how seriously God takes relationship – His and mine.  He is completely in – fully committed – and deeply engaged.  I started to see, through some very difficult encounters where I had to rely heavily on God, because I had no ability to defend or protect myself.   He showed up BIG – I will tell you.  I had such a season of discovery about who God is for me, personally, and truly – I’m still in it!!  And, I will tell you it changed and still is changing how I see people and things and myself and certainly, chiefly - GOD!!  I no longer just talk in generalities about God’s affection, attention and interaction with and for people.  I know that He specifically cares and longs for people to spend time with Him.  Please don’t mistake me – God does not “need” me or other people.  However, He wants me and He wants other people too.  Experiencing that – it was huge for me!  He doesn’t just put up with me – He relishes time with me and enjoys me.  And, GUESS WHAT?  I CAN ENJOY HIM TOO!!  Shocking!! Who knew?  He looks forward to our time together and He’s always attentive to me – even when I’m wandering about completely oblivious (I am quite a Magoo at times).  I want to learn to enjoy Him more and He's teaching me, cause that's what I'm made for!

Does this touch your heart?  I think it touches about everyone’s heart I’ve discussed it with. Significance – everyone is searching for theirs.  When you discover it’s in God – there is no bigger surprise or joy!  After all, THE CREATOR of all things WANTS to spend time with YOU and actually LIKES YOU? Ha ha! WOWEE!  I’M ON TOP OF THE WORLD!!  I’m not important enough to get 2 seconds with Bill Gates, but GOD, the one who knows me better than I know me (the maker of Bill), I can have all day every day with Him in the joy of His company.  Whew – my brain gets twisted THINKING ABOUT THAT!!

It’s Valentines Day again this week.  I’d just like to put it out there for those who don’t really get this – think about it, God liking you.  Ask Him and spend some time listening!!  I guarantee, you will marvel at the answer.